Yet another day.

It's scary how a day passed juz like tat. (ok...i knew i slept half a day away....)

Another night of drinking. This is becoming routine and i am worried. I dun drink myself silly and do stupid stuffs. But i am enjoying the the moment when you are in between consciousness and drunkard state. When you are almost blurred and everything feels so light...so light...

I think I have never plan too far ahead all my life. I live day by day, and i hate routines, fixtures....anything that condone me to the grip of normality, I will resist. I dunno what tomorrow brings and I dun wish to know. I dun comform easily. and I dunno wat i want.

I am bearing a burden...a burden of wat? Life? Regulations? The musts and the don'ts? I am still searching and it's suffocating me. This very moment, I wish I can juz put everything aside and leave. Everything. Am I running away? Too timid to face the course of actions? Never!! Since when is an Aries timid?? This ram might have been leashed for too long. And he can't wait to fly again.

The Mind is indeed powerful. I am thinking too much and am struggling to maintain a sense of balance. Is it emotionally driven? I dunno!! i dunno....really...i am tired.

I need a rest. It's inside and I can feel it. I might not be able to control it for very long. Sam is fighting. Fighting Very hard to be alright. I have to be alright. I will be alright.

This is classic sammy at his best. He will allow himself to free-fall......all the way down to rock bottom and bounce right up again. He has done it before and he will do it again.

Breathe sam. Breathe.