I miss rainy days.

There's hell lotsa rain today. And I love it.

Rain is when sam is brooding. Not sad. Juz brooding. I know it sounds weird...but i kinda like it when i am brooding, hovering close to being depressed. It exaggerated the feeling of despair and how fucked-up life is. When I snap out of this mood everytime, it never fails to remind me to count my blessings.

Is it a reminder of what I have OR what I will lose?

I dunno. I am afraid.

Maybe this ram is indeed ageing, the spontaneity have definitely mellowed. Maybe this is mid-life crisis. (I heard menopause is worse!!)

I was juz telling adrain we are constantly hiding behind veils of realism. The 'can do-s' and 'must do-s' is widening. Ah yang is already complaining, ' there he goes again...' I am not whinning. Just dun quite know the right set of protocols to apply anymore. The heart and head will never agree with one another.

Sighhhhhhhhhhh. Thankfully my red wine dun whines.



'i would love to miss you,
but i know it shouldn't be done.
But if i have not already did,
why i know i can't?'
~Sam G