Last post for 2009.

Last day of the year, last post to sum up everything.

Since I started blogging in July 2008, I have written 152 entries (this included). It started as a curiousity, carried on due to persistence and passion and religiously updated as an outlet for frustrations or documentations of sorts. Reading some of the ramdom posts again brings back tinges of melancholy and refreshes momental state of minds. This blog has been a faithful companion thru my journey and the creation of every posts have been thoroughly enjoyed.

The Breguet Team had a end year dinner yesterday and made everyone participated in a 'round-table' speech, where we are to say our best moments in 2009. When it came to my turn, I was rather stumped. Becos seriously, 2009 hasn't been a fantastic year, with no memorable milestones to recollect. This sobering fact saddens me. It's like wasting a year of living, suspending my existence in the midst of happenings. Standing at the midpoint of Life, it can be liberating knowing it's 30 years after birth or depressing to realise it's 30yrs away from Death. Some life stories can filled chapters, while some struggled to contain pages. I hope mine is not the latter, as I embarked towards the finale. Living Life fully has finally stamped its mark in this slacker's head.

For pals with new members in the household/juz married/getting married/deciding to marry....ALL THE BEST TO YOU! For pals moving to a NEW career/house/love/location...ALL THE BEST TO YOU! For pals I have met/always meet/hardly meet now/never meet eversince....ALL THE BEST TO YOU!

*You know who you are, and you know I dun mince my words. SAm dun entertains people who he can't be bothered with. If I hate YOU, I show it. If I have no interest in hanging out with you, I show it. If I wan you outta my life, I SHOW IT. So if you fall into this category, FUCK YOU, Get a life in 2010!.....ok....Happy New year but still. Fuck you.


I have made some small resolutions and hope for big happenings. And maybe some unplanned surprises. 2010 promise much, so let's see where we will all be this time next year.

So that's about it, I guessed. Bye~2009, Halo~2010.

X'mas thru the eyes of a father.

The little gal was dressed in her pretty flocks. Her innocence and naivety was apparent in her rings around the Christmas tree, as she danced with wide-eyed delight. Such exuberance, such excitement!

'Jingle bells..jingle bells...jingle all the way..'

She danced and danced, caught in the frenzy of the festive mood, oblivious to the doting eyes of her watching father.

'Be careful, Baby!..Don't trip and fall!'

Her father was impassive to the occassion. It has been one Christmas too many, and how time had flown. But he was happy. Happy to see his beloved daughter caught up in the celebration, intrigued by the huge tree with shinning bulbs and glittering stars, just as he was when he was a little boy. In a quiet corner, he watched as his little one busked in the moment. Eyes following her routine, his heart leapt with her every steps, as his sight cherished the tiny figure singing the old, familiar Christmas song. His heart glowed and he let out a soft sigh of adoration.

She ran awhile more, slowed down and stopped. Perspirations lined her brows and she was breathing hard. She will dance again later, around the beautiful tree with beautiful stars. 'Why can't trees be like this everyday?' Christmas has no significance for her yet, but Christmas means beautiful trees with stars. She turned to her Daddy and accelerated into his direction, who is already waiting with open arms.

'Daddy! Daddy! Can we come here again next year?'

'Of course we can, Baby! As long as you want to!'

'I love you Daddy! Merry Christmas!'

'I love you too, Baby! And Merry Christmas to you!'

88 Keys and lost.

I always love the year end period. When the climate is cooler, wetter and less harsh on my already atrocious complexion. We dun have snow in SG, but we have rain. Plenty of it, esp this time of the year.

Juz like now, while I am half blogging, half smoking, and half playing the piano.

I am going to finish my year with a little more time for myself, with my PHs approved over the weekend. And I dun actually have any concrete plans coming up. But I like doing nothing sometimes and juz bum around, since it's becoming scarce having time to do nothing. I heard parties are being planned, mates are eager and gatherings are inminent. But I am not in the least excited by all that. A bottle of red, some fags with a couple of buds will do juz fine as well. I am biggest hater for plannings and spontaneity is the way for me any day.         

I have been playing so much piano, I wonder whether the persistent pain on my right pinkie is the aftermath of that. I definitely signing up for tat specialized piano course in Jan to improve my playing and hearing skills. It's really frustrating when I can't replicate the songs on the piano due to my playing limitations. Damnz! Those majors, minors and 7th chords are killing me, I can't staccato smoothly enuff to hear 2 perfect bars and I dun even know how many *black keys are there on the piano!!

(*There are 88 keys on a standard piano. 52 white keys, 36 black keys. I counted them thrice, juz to be sure.)

I am not looking to turn pro, but I think I have a responsibility to spare my neighbours any further torture. (No wonder my mum always hide in her room when I am playing...) At my current level, I am ashamed to tell anyone I play the piano. I hit more wrong notes than right ones in a piece, I can't do song requests and I always play in one style. Until I get my foundation right again, playing jazz and mprovisations can only happen in my dream. So...practice, Practice and more PRACTICE!!

They said virtusos are either child prodigies or gifted peeps, like Beethoven, Mozart, Ray Charles, Stevie Wonder. I think I muz either be blind or die young to have half a chance. Bleah.

Doing things on my own.

My buds had a swell saturday night, being merry and hanging out. I was alone at home.

Nope I wasn't bothered. In fact I took the time to write another song again! It's wasn't becos I was not invited or intentionally being left out. I juz dun hang out that often anymore, around alot of frens. My circle got smaller and my social activites got simpler. Thanx to the conversation with Yang moments ago (before I decided to post this), I realised there is this new found strength and desire to get on with Life on my own. I am not whinning as much about being alone like before, I am looking forward to fulfilling my plans for 2010. In a nutshell, I dun make plans for/with anyone else anymore.

The start of an event is always becos of someone's agenda or priority. Those who shared the same interest or agenda then join in to do it together. The rest will juz make up the numbers. Many a times, I am one of the headcounts...well, maybe sometimes I share the common passion. Very seldom did the event occur becoz it's ME who want to do it. There is nothing wrong or bad in such social setups. But there is definitely a difference. When it's your own agenda and you fulfill it, something is done or achieved. For those making up the numbers, it's juz another occasion. And I wonder what I could have been doing for myself all this while, instead of living others' occasions.

I never know what I wanna do, what I can do or what I can look forward to. It's always this person's event, that person's plan. Instead of wasting time doing what others wanna do, I could have spend more time for myself. There ARE things I wanna do, places I wanna go, and plans I love to start on. If others wanna join me, hey I am cool! If not, my Life shouldn't come to a standstill either. Everyone have their own lifes, I should live mine too. Why should we shortchange ourselves juz becos no one share our passions/interests/plannings?

I am so looking forward to 2010! The thought of all the stuffs I will try to do is already making me excited. Nothing much to shout about though, but somehow knowing that I will try to do things with/for myself makes me happy. And being happy makes me wanna do more for myself! What a positive chain of thoughts, isn't it? *smile*

I am NOT trying to be a hermit or anti-social. I juz dun wanna to be another number, but I won't stop you being mine. Hah.

Back

So I am back at work in SG.

The same stinky feeling of dread crept in when I set foot into the store this morning. Good times REALLY dun last and I hope it will not be long before my next trip outta here.

Still, I am glad to be home.

I missed my mum, (her), buddies and bed. Nothing beats the familiar smell of my sheets and my beloved pillow caressing my aching neck. 12 days of sleep in a foreign bed took it's toil on my ageing body, I woke up with a nagging backache and sore neck everyday. But then, work in Starhill is like 5 mins walk away from the hotel. Discounting the same spread for breakfast everyday and some irritating characters, this KL trip had been largely enjoyable compared to last year.

I caught up with old frens and met new ones. The hospitality and warmth extended to me from the Omega mates...the familiar banterings and nonsensical antics failed to remind me that it was actually a year ago we last met. Everything looks the same, everyone is still how I last saw them. In a matter of hours, I eased right into their lifes and we worked and played as if I have never been away. I really appreciate the entire majority of the Omega pals for making this stay such a fun-filled one! (Thanx peeps!)

I met Jeslin again, it's nice to see her after a year. It felt more 'proper' calling her a bud now. Prior to this, we only met once and chatted mostly on MSN. So many ppl started asking me about her after I posted her pics on FB...damnz! 1. No, we DUN fancy each other. 2. We are good frens 3. She is single 4. No! I won't pass YOU her contacts.

I befriended this young talented boy, Aaron, while manning the booth in Starhill. He was the pianist for the VIP lounge and my! He has got amazingly quick fingers and a great repertoire of songs! His improvisations for those famous melodies are very jazz-inspired, and there is so much soul in his tinkerings. The maturity in his renditions really belittles his tender age of 20. And he makes playing piano sexy~. But wait till you read his blog; this boy is seriously expressive! The manner he structures his thoughts and articulate them into words, gives so much visuals to his views and emotions. He is a wonderful writer, a multi-instrumentalist and a charismatic budding composer. If he is to make it BIG one day, you hear it from me first! Such talents, such potential for greatness...keep it going! Aaron boy! I am already a fan!

A special mention to Abang Azmi, who care and treated me like family. He is always ever-ready to help. He proves that real friendship supersedes race, religion and nationality. Let's see if I can join him in March for the Tioman trip!

Halfway thru this post, I actually dozed off alit and lost sense of what I was writing. So...there u go, this is my working life in SG. *yawnnnnn* Another hour to go. Till then.

Malaysia 2009

'Malaysia...Truly Asia~....'

Heard this rhyming slogan on the TV while surfing net in the hotel room. Very catchy, rolled off your tongue effortlessly. I wonder if Singapore has her own catchy slogan...Singapore~...Very....... Hor? (Fill in your own word ba! I have too much choices to type here!)

Yang said KL is a fucked-up place, and maybe it's good for fucked-up peeps like me. Hah. Other than work stuffs, I am enjoying my time here. Maybe like what Yang said, I haben stay long enough to feel the 'full' experience. Well...so haben you bro! Anyway I have seen enough to give it a shot if given a chance.

To sum up in 2 words, the exhibition is a 'successful failure'. I basically do the same thing for work here juz as in Singapore. Sit, read, eat, shit, smoke. Put that on loop for 10 cycles and it's almost time to end the day. Thanks to the eye candies and mates to make each day tolerable, this second coming has much quirky tales to share with mates back home. 4 days left and counting, I kinda miss here already.

Later mates~, saya adalah akan pulang tidak lama lagi *smile*

*woof *woof

I am a dog.

Today is the only 3rd day of work in KL, and my body is already screaming in protest. Aching toes, back, shoulders...and there is still 8 days to go. KNNZ. Wakie at 8 a.m., finishes at 10 p.m. I fucking work like a dog.

Thankfully, everything else about KL is wonderful. Food is cheap, pace is slow, warm and friendly ppl...other than the atrocious traffic, I can see myself settling here for good. There is simply no difference between weekdays and weekends, ppl are always in the streets. Full of life, full of energy. Cool!

(What's so bad about KL, Mr. Yap? *smile)

Maybe Fabian can feel this dog is growling already. He had been buying me dinner and drinks for 3 nites in a row. And I will go back late, sleep late and be tired the next day. Fucking tummy is slowly increasing in size too.

*Grrrrrrrrrrr